Category Archives: Uncategorized

Now that’s a lot of country stats!

I logged on to my WordPress blog dashboard to find that my stats are moving. What caught me eye was that wherever my numbers are going to, they are going with 100% more country stats. Now that’s impressive. 100% more than nothing is, I think, a whole lot of nothing.

(So it was, with some surprise that I found there are indeed country stats with my figures.)

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I ate a choc chip cookie today from a vending machine. No one purchases anything from a vending machine and thinks… uhuh… this is going to be good for me. So I wonder why the choc chip cookie manufacturers have decided to label their product ‘28% choc chips’ (as if that was somehow healthy) and even more intriguing: ‘source of fibre.’ My bet is it probably has a bee’s dick worth of fibre in it; just enough to make it a legitimate claim.

Or another personal favourite: ‘50% less salt’. Less than what I ask?

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I bought an ecological flea trap recently. It claims to clear the room overnight. The first night, I caught 7 fleas. I then wondered how I was going to test their claim? If I played Barry Manilow for 3 hours straight do you think any remaining fleas would have surrendered from their hideaways and I could prove the flea trap advertising false?

As a fellow data analyst, I found this hilarious!

Celebrating database death

The ‘switch off’ of Barry – the bloody useless database – is near. So this morning I have one simple question for you all – how should I celebrate Barry’s demise? A mock funeral? An office conga line? A ceremonial burning of the manuals? Champagne and strawberries? I’d like to hear from you.

Oh and my new dilemma will be – what do I name my new database! Suggestions on that welcome too. My only thought at present is big bird. Why? It’s simple, so far friendly and often very yellow.