Crime does pay

It appears that crime does pay. I have proof. When I write serious copy providing sincere advice about how to fight duplicates in your database, I get minimal ‘hits’ on my blog. Post that the database is responsible for the assassination of JFK and the readership increases ten-fold.

So it would appear that a blog comprised entirely of my rantings of data stupidity is going to be more popular than one which seeks to make some serious contribution to the data woes of the non-profit industry. That’s ok, I can live with that. It’s far more fun.

Take this little diversion as an example: if your database was person who would it be?

I thought about the databases I’m using at the moment and started to ponder. Immediately I was looking for a person who was outdated but who put on airs. It was only a few minutes before I nailed it. My database is…

Barry Fife Strictly Ballroom

That’s right, my database is the personfication of Barry Fife from Baz Luhrmann’s Strictly Ballroom. This character, played so exquisitely by the late Bill Hunter, is the epitomy of the database I fight each day. Why?

  • The colours of my database are gaudy enough to match the great Mr Fife.
  • My database is full of crap just like Barry.
  • Barry is a little behind the times but doesn’t think he needs to change. If he simply continues to rant ‘there are no new steps’ then it will be so. My database is a little like this. It has yet to acknowledge that there is an online world. (Aka there are no new fundraising channels)
  • Mr Fife’s methods are somewhat dodgy.
  • My database rivals Barry’s charisma – hair piece and all.
Oh for a charismatic database… like this…

Paul Mercurio and Tara Morice in Strictly Ballroom

Who does your database personify?


Posted on June 13, 2011, in Allied health, Data, Fundraising, Not for Profit and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

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